Kids say the darndest things!

Wow I get up in the morning ready for a wonderful day and the first thing I hear is " I'm only 8 I shouldn't have to help with laundry or do the dishes, I'm to young I shouldn't have to do anything!". Seriously?I was doing laundry and dishes at 7 and if they didn't get done right I rewashed the entire cabinet.

So here is what i did... I sat down my 8 yr old daughter (Carley) and gave her a time out like a 5 yr old. I told her that if she thought she wasn't old enough to do the things she does then why did she bounce like a puppy after bacon and ask to be a 'big kid"? She looked at me like I was crazy and shrugged her shoulders. Yes I may be crazy but I think that if a person no matter what size, is capable of doing things then they should do them. No matter how small we should face our fears and our obstacles with an open mind. I don't make the kids do all the house work but they can help! They help dirty the house and clothes they can take clothes out of the washer and put them in the dryer and bring the clothes to me to be folded. They can do dishes and put them away, they can clean their own rooms. These are simple little things that make them realize how much mom actually does in a day. because when they are in school I do it all!

Now Carley has put her clothes away, dried the dishes and vacuumed the floor today with no problems what so ever. So why is she to young? why should I be so easy on her when everyone else in the house does their share? Because she is the baby and she thinks she should get away with murder and we should praise her for it! So not happening!! I was the baby too and I didn't get special privileges. I got what everyone else did. Two working parents stuck at home with a crazy grouchy grandma who always made us go to our rooms. We had to have imaginations and we had to learn to deal with the crap that the "old people" put on us. Now I get to be that "old person" and I realize that most of the stuff that my parents did was good for me.

Now it's my turn and I am trying to do for my children what my parents missed in us. We were to be seen and not heard or not seen at all. I love my kids and I want them to have an imagination so I let them do as much as possible but I do not let them slide on doing their chores and I do not buy them everything they want just because they throw a fit. I don't give in and the more they cry the longer they get grounded for. It drives me crazy when people give in because they don't want to deal with their kids! Why do you have kids if you don't want to deal with them? Use a condom, birth control, or just don't have sex! Don't do it just because everyone else is doing it. Think about someone other than yourself and realize that they didn't ask to be here and the way you raise them determines the person they will be when they grow up to be your age!

Okay I'm done ranting for now. Crazy as I am I do have chores of my own to do ;0) Have a wonderful day!

Back in action

Ok soooo I know it's been a while since I've posted anything on here. The thing is we have been working through a lot of stuff. Harry got a new job and he is no longer up my ass 24/7. Now we actually have conversation that do not involve arguing and we enjoy seeing each other because he's never here. With it being summer I have been doing as much as I can with the kids and trying to pound it into their heads that somebody has to clean up after them it might as well be them! ;0) Every time I have to pick up something of theirs I make them clean all day. I know I am a mom I am supposed to pick up after my kids blah blah blah! UM NO I refuse to raise lazy kids who want nothing more than to live at home with mommy for the rest of their lives because she does it all. They will be self sufficient and clean hard working people when I'm done with them because that's what will get them the farthest when the are old enough to do it on their own. I love my children with all my heart and I can't imagine them growing up and not having the know how or the want to do for themselves. I want them to be self motivated people who do without asking 'What do I do now?". Don't get me wrong I tell them every chance I get not to grow up to fast. I make sure they know that once they get to a certain point that there is no turning back. I tell them to have fun, play, be idiots and enjoy every stinking minute of it because once your my age and you do things like that people look at you like you've lost your damn mind! I do as much as I can with my kids which isn't much because every time I do something with them I hurt myself, lol. The last thing I did was TRY to go down the slip-n-slide yeah that ended well! One broken tailbone and a month of healing later I still have to sit a certain way to make sure the pain doesn't flare up. It was fun though I loved every minute of it and the looks on their faces when I did it! Ok I am going to save some for later because I am rambling now. Have a wonderful day all! Hope to c-ya soon ;0)

Here we are again another day another dollar! Ok so I told him if I become who I am he would end up hating me. I really don't think he realized that when he said be you and I will never hate you that he may actually end up doing just that. I can't stand not being happy but I should not have to start the conversations all the time initiate the pillow talk every time, Be the nice one all the time and just plain work my ass off to please everybody. I want a relationship that goes both ways I want to stop hiding behind my children and make me happy. I am just terrified that I will hurt them the way I was hurt and I could not live with myself if I allowed that to happen! I want passion and romance, I want love and commitment, I want strength and stability. I just don't believe that I can obtain the things I want and need where I am. My kids deserve better and so do I! I told him I loved him and would follow him anywhere I told him I would live in a cardboard box with him as long as knew he loved me. I'm not so sure anymore. He promised to provide for his family he promised to care and love us with every fiber of his being and at this point all I see is his need to control the situation and trying to make everyone else believe that he isn't. He is not happy and that makes the entire house not happy. Go us right? anyway I guess I'll fill in more of the blanks later I am just ranting today! Have a great day all!!!!!!1

Bleh....

So hello...

I haven't blogged a lot lately. Figured that I would since Tara did...lol. I love you too babe and I have no idea how I would make it through the stupid shit without you. You are my soul-mate and yes it is kind of creepy that we are connected at the brain but I LOVE IT!

*SO*

Bill and I have hit our 10 year blahs just at the same time you guys did. I love him he is a wonderful father to the Storm but sometimes I feel like I am ready to pack up and runaway. I have pondered it many times over the last few weeks. Why is it so hard for him to just appreciate me or act like I have a place in his heart. He breaks his back everyday to support us and I have tried so hard over the last few years to make him feel loved and appreciated. Even on days he isn't too pleasing. I love him and love to hate him...lol. Some days I want to smother him with a pillow till he is blue let him breathe and repeat! He seems to be coming around slowly to the realization that I may not always be here. He is losing himself in the process though I think. He has quit gaming, which I said he does to much of but it is his hobby and would not expect him to quit completely. Everquest 2 is his thing and I am glad he has it and we have made some awesome friends there but seeing him rot away in a computer chair for 4ish years is craziness. He just needs to learn how to moderate it. Bill is a one way thinker though its all or nothing, and nothing is right unless Bill thinks so cause...simply so he puts it "Cause I am Bill its what I do (think, believe, ect..)". He was ready to leave when I sat him down to have a talk with him about living our lives instead of living like we are 50+. I am 27 and ready to have fun. I want to go out and do things. He said he feels like he is holding me back and was ready to get an apartment. I have decided that if he mentions it again that I will not stop him. I will let him go and find a way to support my household. As of right now though it seems like things are going a bit smoother. I have also decided to stop telling him how I feel. If one of us left right now it would crush my 4 yr old and I am not ready to have that guilt on my heart. I am sucking it up and living in comfort. I am keeping my mouth shut and letting him be happy. BUT.... I am going to be myself! I am going out when I want if he is there fine if not GIRLS NIGHT!! I told him I need a weekend a month to myself also to try and gather myself and find who I am. I married at 17 I went from being a kid in my Dads house to being a adult, wife, and mother. I don't want to look back and regret the choices I have made or stifle my life because he wants to be a fuddy duddy! So...Tara get your butt in gear homie we are going to find us one step at a time and we will do it together. WE CAN DO IT! If it wasn't for you I really dunno what I would have done when he said he was ready to go. I know I didn't talk a whole lot but the hours of sitting on the phone listening to you type and yelling at Hag made me feel better. I love you Babers!

Had a great day with the family for Easter! We grilled out and hunted eggs and stuffs. The kids got lots of candy and the adults got to eat it =) Although after we ate everyone decided it was nap time so we packed up our kids and came home. I love spending time with my bestie she makes my day so much better! The world could end and we would kick Satan out of his chair and make him paint our toenails =) I have no idea what I would do without her!!! I love you Kristin! my mind races on a daily but she calms the storm we are both having issues right now. Bleh! It never fails if my toe hurts hers does if she has a headache I do if my man is an asshole hers is you know it's the soul-mate friendship of all time I swear.I just wish I could snap my fingers and make the world so much better and I can't I don't know how to fix either one of our problems and it kills me to know that this pain is here for the duration =( It's crazy because I fell in love with a man a lot like my father and now I am falling out at the same age I was when my parents got divorced. It broke my fucking heart when my dad left for Texas and my mom remarried. I can not imagine doing that to my baby. My life has been a joke since I was born and has just gotten worse as an adult. No matter how hard I try to be a good person and not make the same mistakes my parents did I always mess up! I always stumble and I can't breath on most days while I try so hard to fight the outcome of my life. I do love the man I am with but I have not been in love with him in I can't tell you how long. When the man you sleep next to every night makes you want to cry yourself to sleep, well it's time to make you happy. I will eventually or I will suffocate in this hell I call life. Enough of my rants for the night I hope everyone's Easter was great have a wonderful week ahead !!!!!!!!!1 <(=o}

Random Days!!!

So I am sitting here tired as hell cuz some goofball kept me up texting all night and I had a job Interview to go to today. that seems to have went well for and I am really excited about it! =) So to my random thoughts I am having...... Why do people insist on making their lives a vicious cycle of pain? Me I do it on a daily basis. Somebody kick me please....lol I am at a turning point and I am ready for huge changes in my life! I am going to think a little more about me and a little less about pleasing the world, because honestly when do they try to please me? Just my random thought for the day. Hope everyone has a great one!!!!1 =)

Yes,, I am talking about Michael Jackson!

Why is it that they are making a child molester an icon? I understand he has make some great music but seriously he was appalling and a disgrace. I don't see them making movies about the other icons who have passed recently. He was a sick individual who happen to sing well and have a stage act that got peoples attention. Let him go and stay gone. Can you imagine how hard it is on the children/adults to see his name and face everywhere? In the real world when things like that happen we charge them, convict them, and put them in jail so our children do not have to worry about running into them. They remember enough on their own. So I am now done venting!
k.